I shared previously, that it was after I knew my husband, and especially kids were okay in the car collision that I was able to swallow what had happened and be at peace with whatever was to come. I believe that many of you would be much the same, in first knowing your kids were okay, especially all the mamas, I know you can feel me on this. We tend to (and rightfully so) put the needs of others, especially our kids above our own. There definitely is a responsibility and calling in motherhood. As mothers, it is so easy for us to accept, know, and even preach to our kids that they are fearfully and wonderfully made and that God has a purpose for their lives. Jeremiah 29:11 fires out of our mouths at any given moment, especially those moments when someone may have poked the bear in coming against the purpose of what we know God has for our kids! This is much how I felt amid the chaos and the relief of knowing God had preserved my kids’ lives, just fueled my fire and validated that I know He has BIG things in store for them. While, I would “take one for the team” time and time again to spare my children and my husband who seriously supports our livelihood by all of his hard work and contributions to our family, I had to embrace God’s purpose for ME through this trial and the preserving of MY life too…and God wasn’t going to waste any time in showing up and making sure I did just that.
It was the second night in the hospital that I had to make my husband go stay with the kids and get some real sleep that God woke me up from mine. Now before I go to freaking anyone out, I didn’t necessarily audibly hear Him speak nor did I see Him with my eyes, but I am certain it was He who awoke me from sleep to speak truth into my life and circumstances. Much of my prayers had been centered around thanking and praising God for His protection over my family, but in this moment, God made sure to show me that He had protected me too. It was an ah-ha moment so clear that I know it was none other than a God moment; He Himself speaking truth into me right in the middle of that hospital room. God let me know that He in fact had a purpose for my life too, that He had saved MY life for a reason and just as He had whispered to me before throughout my life, it all full circle slapped me in the face that He has something for me just as much as He does for my kids. I couldn’t help but sit up in that bed, through pain and all and full on praise Him! I can’t accurately put in to words the feeling of knowing these truths; that my God sees me, He knows me, He saved me, and He has a purpose for me.
To have such an encounter with God is something I would not want to ever reverse. Through my pain and uncertainty, God through His mercy and grace showed up and covered me with purpose despite the position I was in.
This irreversible promise is important to understand. We can’t base our purpose on our position or problems, as positions change and problems come and go, but purpose remains. The Bible says in this life, you will have troubles, but Jesus, the literal way, the truth, and life, goes on to say, but take heart, you can overcome, because I have overcome the world. It doesn’t mean just because terrible things happen, that’s the end of it and you can’t press on, it means exactly the opposite, that your purpose remains the same and that you can overcome. Romans 8:28 is a go-to for many and we need to start saying it like we believe it. It says, if you know Him, you have been called according to His purpose and in that He has given you YOUR purpose. As much as you can believe this truth for other people, maybe for your spouse or kids, be your own biggest cheerleader and believe it just as much for yourself. Dig deep in the word, get alone with God, and embrace the purpose He has for you.
